.....     Everyone has distinguished & sometimes unique paradigm.this more often  reveled during interaction.a paradigms is what is one's way he/she see something irrespective of anyone.This is another world for perception which become convincingly true for though they turn out be incomplete & inaccurate in evaluation of conscious.Why it is so?.

As you may noticed ,our paradigms are way off the mark as you see something in your point of view in preoccupied condition individual frame of reference  or belief having different center of priority & concern.Negative paradigm can put limitation on the positive paradigm bring about best in us.Then why each has varying frame of reference.Right from birth ,life is passed through phases like dependent ,independent & interdependent.There are various needs with varying intensity  in the above phases.They varying category of such needs.they any be physical,mental ,emotional social & spiritual one in combination of them.putting them in matrix of life phase will be reckoner of paradigm source which may be examine to to address & refine problems.various natural laws governs with role played by you.Your center of concern becomes critical in determining way you feel has,implacability your response.Dependent are those nurtured and direct self-actualization  and  proactive attitude will transform he/she in to independent in relevant personalty dimension & known hereafter to achieve private victory.

When independent he/she contemplate warmth with permeable and accessible psychological environment.There is psychological difficulty for society as  members of it, differ widely in what they want other-one to be.Thus society's interest sets goals of  top placed personality trait-warmth  and  self-insights are in  listed desirable trait like  self-confidence intelligent religious valued etc. In predicting behavior we must be able to judge how one will behave in in an unknown situation. Man/Woman strive to modify her/himself so that he can better what is real from what is not real.thus it increase his/her happiness ,strengthen  personality for making successful adjustment to physical and social environment. we have paradigm not only about ourselves  also about other people-n-life  general,whatever important to me/you or anyone,will becomes its paradigm by concern and may be spouse family.friends,self sports and other popular center.they mess oneself up their center of life is on things falls to come down law of gravity.principle which apply to everyone 0f rich/poor non-salable and is Fail proof.  The personality goal shape around it love Honesty,gratitude modernization loyalty,fairness are

 some of principles one can live on them.To validate these principle how it work effectively ,just imagine living based on their opposite-a life of dishonesty, loafing,selflessness and hate and you can't do so. Ironically putting principle first key to be,which do better in other center.If you live with principle of service,respect and love for instance,you would likely to pickup more friends with stable friendship.                        

Personality Goal

Personality may be described from trait,structural or adjustment point of views. The structural way it trait view stress the similarities and differences between individual & dynamic organization of trait within individual and in the adjustment wherein, it examines interaction between the person and his/her environment . . . Continued Page2
Dollard and Miller's reinforcement theory explains personality as accumulative product of what the individual learns during life comprise aspect relatively combine effect gene acquired in heredity,learning culture.
A STUDY CONDUCTED with analysis of statistical data of trait measured by following inventory
ACTIVITY by level
MENTAL POWER Temperament

IMPULSIVE Continued page 3
      A Drive is strong stimulus which arises impart of body and impels action.Activity level,SENSORY AWARENESS AND SEXUALITY are drive traits.their strength is determined by stimuli which arise in muscles,sense organ and sex gland..Variations activity level are closely related to genetic factor but better nutrition , more sleep , stimulant or higher level of aspiration marker and sometimes permanent increase.negative , drinking and smoking temporarily decrease awareness.deprivation of sensory stimulation has profound effect upon personality & the amount of sexual activity is largely determined by heredity, but type of is largely determined by what is learned from culture. Sex attitude and behavior can be modified by information psychotherapy and social change.
It refers to characteristic phenomena of individual emotional nature including his/her susceptibility to emotional stimulation.customary speed of response the quality of his/her prevailing mood.It is counter-dependent with approach & attitude of other.People differ in its level of response as well types of it for example laughing crying dear etc.. Emotion produce change in our physical condition & subjective feeling what we intended for other.changes in heart rate.blood pressure ,,breathing intensity electrical response of skin are measure of emotion.
Unshakable Self possessed, Placid-Calm. Serene , Peaceful, Self-sufficient but Apathetic and Sluggish
High excitability, Confused, worries constantly without adequate cause.sensitive unreasonable agitation.Expect a lot from other undermining need of others mood varying from elated to Depressed condition, Woman are more emotional tan men indicate differences in Emotionality are largely body & character's actives' dependent.

There is some evidence that the variation in mood are are more due to internal than to external factor.However general of person's optimism is strongly influenced by degree of optimism pervading in culture.
Strong Emotionality pave way of compassion, Integrity, Security, Expressiveness & Supportive culture.Here is what interdependency inter-played.

Previous        Next page                                                                                    SKIP

No Confidence Motion

With heavy heart & surmise, I admit critic poll initiated by Mr.Rahu Karamchandani in his forum.Reader are free to vote,if they find content to be mis-information if he/she think so.

Character Goal-Habits & Actions.

..MAKING   HABIT   TO ACHIEVE by MONITORING the Self  FOR SELF MAKEOVER/                     

Being  change  agent for an institute   organization or a society call for number of reforms. As said “Charity begins at home”, One should start to take charge of personal issues. One has to make home work on suggestive protocol in alignment of other. In order to gain popularity, Interpersonal skill is needed to bring changes in organization, one has to make introspection.  Organizer leads a pubic life.Success of his endeavor brings gregarious power to win approval of public. In making it so, he/she set example to fellow one sometimes as role model. He/She makes homework at personal level and adapts those habits, which will bring him private victory. Those habits are...


1. Be Focused


2. Envision  Multidimensional Goal




4. Organize life




Understand What You Can Control
Some people discredit and blame themselves for situations that are not in their control. For example, a wife may feel it’s her fault that her husband is abusive. A husband may think it’s his fault that his wife nags too much. Parents may feel it’s their fault that their child is doing drugs because they view themselves as bad parents.You can’t control everything that happens in life. The way you react, on the other hand, is 100% in your control. Whether it is an abusive spouse, a problem teenager, or a very interfering mother-in-law, the way you react most likely determines the outcome. It’s important to remember Steve Covey’s concept to better understand how much control you really have over the situation.Sort out what you wanting, displaying in concentric   two circle/area. Inner circle is one wherein you can having control and Space between inner & outer in presumed          for rest problem that can not be in your control and still make you to worry about.Steve Covey describes the importance of understanding what is and isn’t in your control in two concepts called: “The domain of influence and the circle of domain of concern.” People are invested in different interests in the world, such as politics or sports, but they have very little influence in some of these areas. For example, if you are a sports fan, your domain of concern for your favorite team is very large, but the circle of influence is small. On the other hand, your domain of influence over yourself is very strong since the main influence you have is on yourself. You can change and control how you react to situations. To change or help other people, you usually have to lead by example. But even then, it’s not guaranteed to change them because your circle of influence over them is not necessarily that strong. You can try to influence others, but you can only control yourself.
Between stimulus and response human has greatest power-freedom to choose. With self mapped. Human began to develop the habit taking initiative in any environment proving him/her to be highly effective. Proactive  is word defined for it. The proactive person recognizes responsibility and carryout in any adverse circumstances and condition and don’t empower those things to control, their behavior is function of own decision. The test of adequacy of personality in way it reacts to frustration. Repression of conflicts is basic psychological mechanism employed particularly by those of enduring nature. Defense mechanism like Aggression, Lack of rationalization, compensation and projections are drawing. It is also known that 'Escape mechanism' like negativism fantasy and regression comes along with repression. While is helpful to consider separately each of mechanism, as usage all together in in-consistence portion will result in overlap and intertwine.

Aggressive, as we call the person trying to gain something from another. In way tries to hurt or destroy what he sees as source of frustration. The aggressive response may be classified as extra punitive or intro-punitive

            Extra-punitive response is one in which individual aggressively attributes or reason the failure to the external person or thing. And Introspective response is one in which individual aggressively attributes   frustration to himself. In both the case it may help relief & lands in comfort zone, which is sort term gain for him/her.

It is only you, who keeps you back from doing things,

Besides feeling victim, reactive people

are easily offended

Blame others.

Get angry

Whine & complain

Wait for things to happen to them

Change only when the want to  do so.


Proactive people are the one, who

Are  not easily offended.

Take responsibility for their choice.

Think before they act.

Bounce back when something bad happens & find way.

Focus on things what they can do & don’t worry about things what they can't.

It is only when we want  to work in the Circle of  influence us, their by we focus on our paradigm that create positive energy  that change ourselves and influence condition lie reactive selfish lifestyle on Circle of concern without evolving  circle of influences. Proactive people have circle of the Circle of concern is at least as big as Circle of Influence.


Becoming  change agent.

You have the power within to rise above whatever passed dawn to you and you may not have option to escape fro it, but you can figuratively move upstairs in mind. Irrespective of status, YOU can become  change agent  for new avenue

Growing to be Proactive

Use following  tools to help you to decide what to do.

SELF-AWARENESS    I stand apart from myself and observe my thought and action.

CONSCIENCE               I listen my inner voice to know right from wrong. I will keep it always tuned.

IMAGINATION.             I can envision the new possibilities.

WILL POWER               I have willpower to choose.


HABIT 2... Envision Multidimensional Goal

SCRUTINIZE positive v/s Negative objectivity in Self, relative effects of other & circumstance their off.

Refer and apply Ennergramm chart to identify most appropriate/approximate that marks  in existing trait

Positivity turning to achieving respective goal that encourage self with pleasure to move forward.

Prepare  Blueprint WITH END IN MIND

 Set Long term in consultation or consideration of other,

While habit no 1 is driver of life ,this habit is  navigator decide where you want to reach and draw map for it. Love & harmonious in relationship are  highlight of long tem goal.

Make short term goal,

Now think deeply & discreetly

What you have done over your past-life objectively

Understand What You Can Control

Change Yourself in Order to Change the Family

Making change in conformity to expect ion & demands of society

How do you feel inside?

What you want to happen?

What are driving forces???

What is  your strength to accomplish?

What are traditional practice intended in line with community mission?

What were popular goals patronized?

The pat you choose today can shape you forever. It is both frightening as well as exciting as you have to make vital decision   at early stage of life.

Make Personal Mission.

One such mission statement may be,,

a)       Do trust in self everyone around

b)       Be kind cautious to all

c)       I will address reachable goal

d)       Appreciate other peoples' difference for  my advantage.

e)       Shrive each day to evolve interdependence.

Short-term Goals In comparison to long-term goals, short-term goals can be achieved in a shorter amount of time. For instance, a family may decide to save money for a fun family/community vacation during the summer. Or, if a couple is having a bad week, they may set a short-term goal to plan an evening a----------Click here-To Affirm----------------------------lone together

4.  Organize life            (Reviewing Goal-Back Link )

Make list of priorities

We can have elaborate list of our goal and good intention, but doing is hard part. Habit of "Making Initiative'' calls for your Will power.

The willpower can override roadblocks. With limited resource, the better organize yourself the more you will be able to schedule activities. The Time quadrant model is applied to segregate activities in following.


Q1   Goal and related act are Important & Urgent      Procrastinate

Q2        -  do  -      Important but    NOT URGENT    PRIORITIZES

Q3       -do -                   NOT Import-ant But URGENT   YES man  

Q4         -do-                    Neither  Imp NOR Urgent            Slacker                                   

Most time, Important job becomes urgent as we have not acted in past. Sometime unavoidable by situation.

Urgent job are not bad. The problem comes when we become so focused that we put off things that they can be done in extension of time. Urgent  jobs exhaust such that important jobs pushed aside uncertainty.

It shift to priority quadrant and upset excess resource are consumed for reschedule. The result of too much time is Stress /Anxiety and bad Quality.

Quadrant 3 The Yes man

The jobs fall inQ3 are deceptive urgent things have appearance to of important,

but they are not often so. They distract and mislead to misunderstood. These are unimportant phone call, peer pressure, unreasonable couscious of other reaction. It makes inevitable interruption. It is procedural hindrance yielding no value service to goal.

The result o spending too much time to Q3 is..


Reputation of being a 'Pleaser'
Lack of discipline

Quadrant 4  Slacker.

       Too much TV, GOSSIP, COMPUTER OBSESSION are identified activities under this quadrant. They are time waster. It is harmless in dealing aspect of other quadrant. It lacks concern and contribution to goal. It infers

Lack of trading

        Of responsibility


Quadrant 2 In Q 2 indicates the things that are  important but not urgent like relaxation, partying, exercise etc. It holds in availability of time. It is quadrant of excellence-the place we want to be, recovering burnt out of Q1.One can look to everything’s one want to do maintaining priorities. One can gain satisfaction of accomplishment.The result of living in Q3 is Control of your life, Balance High performance. With limited resource of time, only way to find much time  Q 2 IS TO REDUCE THE AMOUNT OF TIME SPEND IN OTHER QUADRANT LIKE Q 1 Q3 AND Q4.

Shrinking Q 1procrastinating less. One time overhauling  method ,in order to cut down Q 1 doing important before it becomes urgent.

Say No to Q 3 activities Learn to say no to
unimportant one.

Cut down Q 4-Slacker activates, Curtail excessive relaxation ,entertainment and leisure to shift the time to Q  2.

Now look again at nature of those actvity. If you did on regular basis in crisis of time, you would make tremendous  positive difference in your life  ....impact on life effectiveness takes quantum leaps when we do it.

Set a goal to use planner for one month, stick you plan.

Identify your biggest  time waster. Evalute it's utility. Do needful.

For pleasure label, have courage to say No today when it is required so.

Do regular jobs./ study for student,

Block our time for some things you have procrastinator

Identify  inhabit things fear, jump out of comfort zone. stop that



Thoughts governing Actions

Recent studies is addressed the relevancy of comfort zone emanating slacker activity.Not withstanding ,politically targeting persons tenancy taken as blame game, consorting effort are made to study impication of thinking patterns.The process is aimed to  dispel ambiguities  triggered by past experience. genetic & environmental factors.A sweeping of thoughts is defined by Swami Sukhbodhand here as subject of "undoing" as he call for understanding. 


One has to propound idea of self-actualization for image building. The image perceived by others.Shall I like to dwell on it for ever? Or renew at times?

So we continue to add new layers of complexity to our lives as soon as any one layer falls away by accident or intention. We have barely left one job before we feverishly clutch onto the next opportunity, no matter whether or not our pocketbook allows us a respite. We finally succeed in abandoning an unfulfilled relationship, yet weeks later we’ve already engaged in another. We don’t allow life to become simpler. In fact, we’ve become experts in complicating it – and then we suffer from the ensuing worries, stress, and endless complexities.


Our superego tease us with question like ‘Am I worthwhile person because my talent has led me to achieve a respected position in my family, company or social life? – We are never with ourselves, never centered in own being in respect of inner identity. With ups&down in life the fluctuations through which your exterior identity may go. Position gone, identity destroyed Position improved, self-worth soaring.


The trick is to learn to think in such a way that we remain centered in our being no matter what changes may take place in the roles we happen to pay (engineer, board member, gardener) or how intense the pace of activity around us may become. No need to quit jobs, change alliances, run away from frenzied households. We can learn to push the “undo” button while continuing with our lives as they are. We just need to shift our thinking in clear way.

 Unloading in learning to find the quiet eye at the center of our varied storms



A truly free person is one who can look at a tree and see a tree.


If we look at the tree and suspend our thoughts for a while, we enter a new, rejuvenated world. We are then fully present to see the tree at it is – not as we may describe it in our imagination in our memories. We make no judgments or choices. We feel no regrets. We dream no brilliant futures.




As you look at the tree, try to feel its essence. Let it speak to you in its own language. Feel its perfection. It’s perfect as it is. The limbs are fashioned with precision. The leaves vibrate with life. Even the dry branch with its dead leaves has its role to play.


The mind walks on our thoughts. The more thoughts we chain together by association, the stronger the bridge becomes for the mind to walk upon. When we cut back on the inner dialogue, we break down some links in the chain and allow for silent spaces between our thoughts. If we learn to stay intensely aware while in those silent spaces, we begin to see and hear the world in a newly vibrant and dynamic way.


In such a world surcharged with the intensity of our pure, aware thinking, we could never be bored, no experience would ever be stale, no thing or event would ever be taken for granted. We would literally be reborn fresh every moment of our existence.




As you look, hear, smell, and touch, gently lift the mind away the minute it wants to start dwelling on a new association (the mailbox ma remind you that you haven’t written to your mother in six months, for example). Keep the mind focused. And as you focus on each and every detail, see yourself seeing it.



This overarching Principle is the primordial ground in which all existence is rooted, the “beingness” that the pervades all that is. It is the life force that drives your existence and mine, as well as the vitality pulsating in the worm and the amoeba. It is the “is-ness” of everything conceivable, both moving and unmoving.




While sitting in a meeting, or within a circle of talking friends or family members, find a few moments when your active participation isn’t needed.

Become very aware of your being. Sense your presence. Notice how you’re sitting, how you hands are positioned, where your feet are. Don’t move. Continue sensing your own being.


Your can remember to experience your being any-time, anywhere – and become fully present in the situation. You can open up to the being of others, becoming more aware and more sensitive to what up to the being of others, becoming more aware and more sensitive to what is going on in the moment and what others around you are experiencing..

When all thought of otherness is dropped, full identification with the other takes place. Looking at the other is the same as looking at yourself. You stare at the one with whom you identify, and you feel as though you were looking at yourself. This is a very pure form of love – not lust, but, love. In the story of Leyla and Mejnun, the ancient Romeo-and-Juliet story from the East, after a painful separation of the lovers, Mejnun finally finds his Leyla again and stars at her in wonderment. He does not see her. He sees only himself staring back at him.







Start with something simple a pencil once again. There it lies, a skinny yellow stick with a few black marking on it, a band of golden metal at one end, topped off by a short cap of pink eraser. You bought it at the stationery store for a few rupees. You pick it up endlessly to scribble notes by the phone, take down messages, and scratch the back of our head.


What is that simple little item – really? What kind of wood is it made of? Where did the wood come from? When the tree was felled, did the lumberjack know that this tree was destined to become a series of pencils, or was the pencil-wood a mere leftover from bigger lumber destinies? Who modeled it into its present shape? How was the tiny tunnel through its center cut? How was the graphite, the “lead,” packed in? Where did the graphite come from, and in what form? How many steps did it take to bring the bit of rubber to the plant in which the four substances – wood, graphite, and metal rubber – were joined to form a pencil? Who got the pencil to the store where you so handily picked it up for a few rupees?



The team-building seminar is our modern-day counterpart of the ancient Vedic ritual. Like the villagers of Vedic times did know, and the managers of our present-day corporations know, that one person can accomplish little by himself of herself. One person may inspire a company or a nation, one individual can ignite many hearts and minds to new endeavors, but, alone, one person cannot produce much at all.


If you have so many other people and forces to thank for creating the reality of a simple pencil in your life, just think what complexity of cooperation must be reached for a greater enterprise – for instance, developing a new vaccine, or creating a new computer, or publishing a new weekly magazine.

Where are you, the doer, in all this? How much are you really doing?


If we don’t learn to recognize the inter-play/inter-action/interdependence of the contributions of countless others, hence we realize that we no longer serve as a useful role or importance in the greater whole.


Exercise was done with study of two group invited for meals. The meal was about to begin. The tables were laden with sumptuous food. Both group was instructed to take meals without bending elbow

The second groups, the unloving ones, were insulted by the unorthodox instruction and staged a walkout even before the food was served.

The first group, the cooperative ones, struck upon a solution very easily. Without bending one elbow in the entire group, they stretched their arms across the table and fed each other.





We become very attached to the way world appears from nearby with particular instrument of perception. This varies from mind to mind resulting in diverse set of instrument

That unchanging factor against which all changes play out is you in your inner most essence and I in may innermost essence. When the thought-curtain is parted, you and I tap into the principle of which were shown by the ancient sages...


One of the many names that Principle is given is pure consciousness. It is the primordial ground in which all life is rooted and the foundation on which our individual thought-worlds have their play.






Trying to describe consciousness in words, or to see it with our minds, is like trying to see the light of the flashlight after we’ve removed its batteries. But let’s give it a try, because we have only our minds to work with as our tools, limited though they are. The examples above have shown us that consciousness can be characterized as follows.


Consciousness is changeless irrespective changes playing on it.

Consciousness is all prevailing

Consciousness can not be bound.

Consciousness is timeless. To reach the purity, peace and wholeness of Consciousness, we need to roll back the film our mind. We have to suspend the movie.




A wave is the notion of a form in the ocean.


The ocean is nothing but water. At times we see small waves, at times big ones. At times, we see foam, as waves go crashing against the shore. At times, we see small bubbles bursting from the tip of a wave. We look at a wave and we know that it is part of the ocean. We know that it is essentially water. But let’s switch our perspective for a moment.




“My life my identity, my existence”, Mr. Wave. Its paint comes from its ignorance. It does not realize that its form and its form and its name are but temporary manifestations of its real nature, the ocean. If it realized that it was, indeed the mighty ocean itself, all regret and fear would dissipate in a second.


Once we realize that our essential being is Consciousness, which we share with all other beings, our world view is recast completely.


  • We realize that there is no otherness in others.


  • We realize that birth and death are just temporary manifestations within our larger, never-changing nature. Death becomes impotent.


  • We begin to feel a profound intimacy with all of lie – human, animal, plant.





With the help of everyone who has reared him, nurtured him, educated him, and advised him, he has quite thoroughly lost all his sense of being. He has become a collection of compartmentalized thoughts. The more precisely he draws distinctions between himself and the rest of the world- this is shows him to be unique – the more praise he receives. And yet, the greater becomes his expertise in seeing the otherness of things, the more he suffers for it. For any thought of otherness brings much pain.




Once we have returned, even for a moment, to s state of undifferentiated consciousness, when we have felt the mind go quiet and have enjoyed the profound feeling of live and peace in that quite space, we can never again be quite the same. In that quiet space, we will have experienced an incontestable conviction that we have returned home and have regained our true nature.




We go through our lives half asleep. Our sleeping potion is our own mind, which keeps our alertness dulled by allowing itself to be yanked around in countless directions.


Norman insults us, and our mind begins caring with ideas of revenge. Kate flatters us, and we continue for many long many long minutes gloating on the details of her flattery. Each of us has his or her own set of mind habits that insidiously keep us from staying alert to the present. We spend our days in endless inner talking, accounting, self-justifying, imagining.


For several long minutes you have been asleep to the present, while dwelling on the events of a dead past.


Where our mind, is where we are just because the eyes keep reading doesn’t mean that we are present in the reading activity. Our mind’s location determines our location.


Many of us often experience this kind of absent-mindedness” on the road- when the mind is not in the location, or cognizant of the action, in which the body happens to be engaged. We travel the same route to work every day. We know every turn and every corner. Or we might say that an instinctive, mechanical part of ourselves knows every turn and every corner and can trace the route without fail, while automatically reacting to traffic on the road.


Constant alertness is the method for getting us out of this dead space we have to train to our kids to remember to stay in the present. We can begin by doing some introspection exercises at the end of each day.




As long as we are alive, our minds will continue in their merry dance. We can lean to control our minds, guide our thoughts in positive, productive channels, but our minds; guide can never be stopped – at least not for long. And even when do succeed in productively redirecting them into positive streams of thinking, we will still be caught unawares now and then by emotions that don’t please us.


What do we do?


We can learn how not to identify with our thoughts, and that learning begins with our knowledge of anew perspective on who we are. Once we know that our essential nature is not our busy-body mind but the quiet ground underlying it-consciousness-we begin to give the mind less credence. We take it less seriously. It ceases to have the same power over us as before.


Strong emotions, lots of noise. Add a little detachment-a dash of non-identification with the emotions in your mind – and you’ve entered a clear, clean, wonderfully liberating space. When we are lucky enough to hit such moments, we feel like newborn beings. We feel that nothing can touch us, that we have the power to do anything. We see others clearly, unencumbered by resentments and worries.




As you get more proficient as witness of your thoughts, you’ll discover a joyous sense of freedom inside yourself. You’ll take your often-misbehaving mind less seriously and over time, it will misbehave less. You’ll find that you can return to that quiet center within yourself anywhere and anytime.




Consciousness, our real nature, can be likened to the sun. As Consciousness reflects in the various forms of life, its nature seems to change. Reflected in a calm mind, it is a peaceful and undisturbed. Reflected in an agitated mind, it seems to be disturbed, restless. Reflected in a sluggish mind, it seems dull. However, Consciousness itself is never touched, just as the sun is not touched by the disturbances its reflections undergo.


We can think of the mind as having three main moods, or textures, comparable to the three buckets of water.


·         Calm and undisturbed. The state of mind is characterized by a relaxed intensity. The mind in this mood is the very opposite of sluggish, yet it is totally calm. In this mood, the mind does its most creative work. This state of mind can be likened to the bucket of water with an undisturbed surface, in which the sun is reflected whole.

Inspired, creative people enjoy this state of mind much of the time. Poets, artists, philosophers touch this mood often. However, avocation has no one-to-one correlation with this mood. You can be a samurai warrior and yet remain calm and undisturbed in your mind.


·         Restless and disturbed. This mood can be likened to the bucket of water in which a rock was thrown. They feel driven to action, often suffering from their own feverish mental activity.


·         Inactive, sluggish. In this mood, the mind is dull. Most minds are in this state the first minutes after waking up in the morning. Many minds remain that way throughout the day. Lazy. Uninspired, dull activity results from such moods of the mind. They think slowly, work slowly, and, preferably, do as little as possible.


Although each of us has a mind that fits predominantly into one of the three categories, each of us also experiences all three moods on an alternating basis. The first half hour of the morning after awakening finds most of us a little sluggish. Again, late at night after a hard day’s work, the mind may turn dull. As we work on a three-year marketing strategy statement at work, the mind may move into a very calm, inspired state. Yet, that same mind will move into a more feverish mood when we find out that our sales figures for the past quarter dipped 9 percent below the previous quarters.




1.         Activating the body. Take a brisk walk, even if it’s not the prescribed time for exercise. Walk vigorously and with purpose. As your body picks up movement, so will your mind.


2.         Dishing out a little discipline. If you get very tried of your mind’s persistent sluggishness, exert some discipline on the body. Deprive yourself of one meal, say, or take a cold shower. As you’re taking the shower, with your mind resisting every second of it, say to it. “If you continue to misbehave and not follow my wishes, I’ll do this to you again.” You’ll be amazed at the results.


3.         Going through the motions. Often, especially in creative work, the mind may not always be ready to soar when you want it to. During those sluggish periods, go through the motions as though you were fully motivated to the task. If you’re about to do a photography session, go through elaborate physical preparations.






We set high goals, work long hours to accomplish them – and suffer greatly when we don’t in the meantime, and pharmacists keep dishing out pills.


Let’s go back for a moment to “A Confluence of Forces,” where we saw that no one person does anything by himself or herself. All activities are intertwined. Even to create a lowly pencil, many forces are at work. If we dwell on this concept further, we realize that we are part of a fabric far more vast than the boundaries of our own individual lives and activities. What I do affects you. What you do affects me. We do nothing in isolation.


The laws of cause and effect play in every field of activity, including corporations. These laws determine how objects fall or how sound travels through the air. If you stomp your feet on a wooden floor don’t protest when noise is the result. You choose to stomp your feet (your action), but you cannot chose the mechanism by which sound is produced (the result of your action).


·         Do your work in an attitude of non-attachment to the results. Enjoy the process; don’t spend you energies thinking anxiously about the results.


·         Put forth every effort to accomplish the task before you but remember that the results are not in your hands. They are the effects of countless circumstances and conditions not under you control.


·         If the results do come out as expected, don’t be too elated. Remember, you were only one actor among many in making them happen, you are not the owner of those results. Ultimately, the results of your action were produced by laws of cause and effect.


·         If the results don’t come out as expected, don’t be dejected. Remember, even these results (failure or limited success) are not yours to claim. Before starting your action, you were not aware of all of the factors that would affect the desired result (the wind moving you bull’s-eye, for instance), so you may have made a misjudgment in anticipating a successful result.


Once we develop this kind of thinking, even our most frenzied activities will lose their sting. We’ll be able to work in a more   relaxed mood – and we’ll enjoy the process infinitely more. And, as a bonus, our results will improve, because our minds will be busy creating, not worrying about future outcomes.




At first the inner commentary will seem saccharine and hypocritical. Never mind. You’ll get used to it as the newness of the thought settles into you consciousness. In time, you’ll be using no specific words. You’ll have developed an attitude of surrendering your self-promoting thoughts to thoughts of cooperation, gratitude, appreciation, and service. These positive trends of thinking will uplift you mood, make your work more efficient, and transform you into a person far more pleasant to work with than the ego-driven, self-centered individual you were before.


Without this spirit of surrender to a greater whole, work becomes stressful activity, often-even drudgery. In such a world, severe boundaries exist between work and play. We assume that if we’ve worked hard at our jobs, whether in the workplace or at home, we deserve to enjoy ourselves at some leisure activity. The opposite is true when we work itself becomes play. In fact, it becomes a fulfillment.




Our wordless thoughts can literally create and recreate our reality. The thoughts we entertain in our minds determine what we see in the world, thus creating our reality for us. And when our thoughts change, we change, instigating change all around us. Our faces look different, our body language changes, our tone of voice alters. Often unconsciously, other pick up those changes and them, too, act differently as a result.




You’ve gone to the local fair. One of your favourite activities is going to the Hall of Mirrors. You enter the hall and begin your procession in front of the myriad mirror.


Within a few short seconds, you’re breaking out in peals of laughter. In one mirror you appear as two lchabod Cranes strung together vertically head to toe. Your arms look seven feet long; your face has been elongated past recognition. In the next mirror you are squashed into the shape of a tire, with a silly grinning mouth two feet across. Next you see an image of a person twisted into a zigzag from head to toe.


No matter how incredibly distorted you look, you keep on laughing. None of the image disturbs you. Whether the image, you know without a doubt that you, the real you, is perfectly OK whole, untwisted, unstretched.


Take this exercise out of the Hall of Mirrors into your everyday life. As we’ve already seen, out real nature is pure Consciousness, awareness unadulterated by the layers of body-mind manifestations playing upon it.


We generally have trouble seeing anything as it is. We see it all through a screen of memories and associations – that is, through what we call our mind. If our mind holds memories of sadness, we see a sad world. If our mind associates pain with the appearance of a hypodermic needle, we feel fear. A member of a primitive jungle tribe looks at the same sharp instrument and feels no pain. To him it’s just a funny-looking thin thing attached to a tube.


Behind the superficial layers of body and mind, the centered one sees in everyone the underlying calm and purity of Consciousness. With a quiet mind, this person enjoys the dance of thoughts, both inside and in others – and the thought manifestations called actions – as much as he or she enjoys watching the waves play on the surface of the ocean or the distorted figures in a Hall of Mirrors at the fair.




The love and care are spontaneous and totally unselfish. The finger asks for no recompense for having helped the eye, nor does the hand expect a reward for massaging the muscles in the leg.


We lust for another when we feel the otherness of the other. However, when we feel unity with the rest of humanity, love pours forth spontaneously.


As Swami Chinmayananda, the modern-day Vedanta put it. “Don’t fall in love, rise in love.” Falling in love is getting ourselves entangled in dependency and want it often makes us anguished and miserable. Rising in love, on the other hand, is filing ourselves so fully with thoughts of oneness with the rest of the world that we give love to others effortlessly, no matter what others give to us. And the more we give, the more there is to give. The sun shines on everyone alike, sharing its own warmth spontaneously and liberally. The rose blooms forth for all to enjoy. I don’t withhold its fragrance from the criminal to waft it forth instead on a pair of lovers.


Our actions are the visible face of our thoughts. If our thoughts are self-serving, lustful ones (“I want this and I want that”), our actions will manifest themselves accordingly. We will manipulate people and situations to get what we want. We’ll “love” those who can promote our well-being, pander to those who can contribute to our benefit. Any job we undertake will be for selfish ends only: to provide for ourselves and possibly for our immediate family.




Was your “loving” action totally unselfish, or did you want something in return?


Life, in general, is a power play for its many participants. In nuclear and extended families, in welfare organizations, lust for power motivates many of our actions, including some of our most “loving” ones. However, as we begin to understand the true essence of our personal realities, our minds expand to include a greater circle of awareness and identity, and we begin to expend our energies in order to be of service to others. We become a little less ego-driven and a little more inspired to work for a larger cause – raising funds for a new hospital, supporting a political movement, or teaching young people in the community how to fill their idle hours productively. When our lust is fully transformed into pure love, we work in total dedication to others. We expect no return for our labors, we yearn for no result. In our every work and action, we simply pour forth our love to all within reach.





Where the ‘I” is dominant, no place is left for anything else. We cannot acknowledge the rest of creation, nor any ultimate cause out of which it may have emanated.


A person who has not thought life through in this way places his or her sense of self mainly in the body. The individual’s every effort is to satisfy the body, to keep it healthy and happy at all costs. This preoccupation draws boundaries around one as close as the narrow confines of one’s physical frame. Beyond the wall of skin, there exists a world that can puncture, mutilate, tarnish, and infringe upon the fragile domain within the skin? Separateness from the rest of creation is total.


When the individual’s awareness becomes a degree more subtle, he or she begins to identify less with the body and more with the mind and intellect. The person now opens his or her view to expansive new fields of consciousness.


The sense of “I-ness” that we carry with us is the result not only of our identifying with a particular physical equipment but also of our feeling intricately associated with every thought in the mind. But if we learn to place our attention beyond our thought, where we can abide as a dispassionate witness of all that proceeds on the physical, mental, and intellectual levels, we are in pure Consciousness – our true, egoless nature. In that state we are free of all physical or psychological demands. The mind abides in its true nature. Consciousness. Sometimes – when we contact a person of deep dispassion or when we experience moment of wonder at Nature’s glories or when we joyfully listen to laughter of a baby – we may find the mind reveling in that sphere of no demanding consciousness for a while.


It doesn’t realize that if it continues to indulge in wanting, it will never feel a moment of satisfaction. It will continue to see the world as something apart from itself, and often as something that prevents it from feeling complete and full and joyous.




Being a good person is a practical matter.

When we are exhorted to be honest, fair, and forgiving and to refrain from killing, jealousy, and stealing, we generally feel that some Big Brother is looking over our shoulder, demanding that we follow those guidelines for good living. Because we feel that the prescription to be good comes from an outside source, we may even resist the exhortations to follow certain prescribed values. We want to feel totally free – free even to choose to do the wrong thing if we so choose.


They told us, “Don’t lie” and “Don’t cheat,” and we followed those instructions largely because the closest authority figures in our lives were handing them out to us. But unless our parents did an unusually sensitive job of rearing us, they may not have taught us those values in such a way that they became part of our own thinking. The values remained unassimilated, and we grew up with them still uninterested into our mindset.


When values are unassimilated, they remain external to us. We accept them for the sake of some outside entity, either an authority figure or the recipient of our good act. If we abstain from murdering our enemy, we do so because we fear lie imprisonment or death. If we don’t steal from the account entrusted to us, we do it because we’re afraid to being caught by whatever authority figure is in power. If we don’t cheat our business partner, we think we are doing it in order to be fair to him or her.




Keep alert to the working of your mind throughout the day. Catch your mind at every opportunity was it wants to diverge from truth fullness. You’re bound to run into many opportunities.


·                When you feel tempted to pretend to be greater than you are in order to cover up your deficiencies, stop. Be yourself. Let others accept you for what you are.


·                When you feel tempted to give a false excuse for not making it home at the prescribed hour, don’t spin tall tales. Tell the truth.


·                Even if the IRS should send you a check for ten times the projected refund amount, don’t keep it. Own up.


Although many times the choice between a good action and a bad one is quite obvious to us, life often presents us with decision points that are not clearly defined. We may have understood and accepted the fact that good living yields a tranquil mind, but we may not always know what “good” consists of.


In the same way, in teaching yourself the are of making sound decisions in life, first read the words that good people before you have left as guidelines for right living. Watch, if you can, living people in action who exemplify the values you admire. Then, following their example, start practicing in your own life. In time, you’ll develop a feel for what is the right thing to do, the right decision to follow – just as the young painter learns to develop a feel for the way his colors are mixed on the palette.




The persistent sense of want that we generally experience, of not being quite what we want to be, arises out of our misunderstanding of where happiness lies. We desire an object, person or situation, and because mind feels a jolt of joy when we reach our desired goal, we think that happiness must lie in that object, person, or event. In fact, it does not.




The calmer our minds become, the happier we feel. They need not necessarily slow down; they can be in a very creative, yet undisturbed, mood. If happiness emanated from objects, people, and events, then more of the same should bring us more and more happiness. Instead, the opposite is true.


1.             Your desire grew out of the mistaken notion that having ice cream would make you happy.


2.             The desire made your mind restless.


3.             The minute you accomplished you goal, eating ice cream, your mind was stilled and felt happy.


4.             As you continued to eat ice cream, dissatisfaction replaced your pleasure.


But because we do experience those jolts of joy when the mind calms down after satisfied a desire that pops into our minds. As we go about our daily lives, a guideline well worth remembering is this.


The number of desires fulfilled1

Happiness        =

                                    The number of desires entertained


1.             Increasing the number


2.             Decreasing the denominator


We can, indeed, increase our happiness, at least for a little while, by increasing the numerator, the numerator because as we fulfill an existing desire, we quiet the agitations in the mind created by that desire. Also, if we have a decreasing number of unfulfilled desire, the agitations in the mind are lessened. In either case, it is the reduction of agitations in the mind that quiets the mind and produces a moment of joy.





The best way to think of the family, the community, or the workplace is to conceive of them as laboratories in which we experiment with our roles in order to grow into more wholesome personalities. Each institution we meet up with in life, even life itself, can be thought of as a laboratory – a training ground – for us. When your teenage son revolts against your parental authority, when you boss becomes unreasonable in her demands, or when the church committee leader snubs your considerable contribution to the latest fund-raising drive, take each event as a method that life employs polish you to perfection.


In fact, we can take each problem in life as a blessing in disguise, for each problem can help perfect our personality – if we apply the art of right contact.


You can maintain correct contact to the grindstones in you life, if you remember to do the following:


·                Keep your mind calmly detached from the activities and the personalities at hand. A good place to start practicing this detachment is at home, or, if you live alone, in the workplace.

·                Be aware of your tendency to react automatically to events around you Deflect any automatic reaction by thinking deliberate, positive thoughts and taking deliberate, positive actions. Avoid feeling like a victim.


·                Practice detachment from any emotion that ends up overpowering you Acknowledge the emotion (don’t block I or repress it) but hold your sense of self separate from that emotion.


·                Remember the interconnectedness of all activities. An isolated event may not make sense, placed in a larger context, it will yield new meaning.


·                Remember the interconnectedness of all activities. An isolated event may not make sense, placed in a larger context, it will yield new meaning.


·                Be grateful for what you have Understand that satisfying one desire or another will not yield you additional happiness. Being thankful for the blessings you enjoy will make your mind peaceful.



We can use this kind of inquiry to see the essence behind any situation, person, or thing- especially those we get inordinately attached to. One of the strongest motivators for attachment is sexual desire, which now and then gets directed toward an inappropriate object (such as your neighbor’s wife). When that happens, try this exercise.





Tuning ourselves to the right frequency enables us to tune in to the Consciousness that is the very foundation of our existence. We tune in by tuning out thoughts that block our realization of our deep and pure nature. We tune out such thoughts as:


·                I am incomplete. I need something or someone else to complete myself.


·                I’m not satisfied with my life. I need x and y to make my life really fulfilled.


·                I’m always worried about what others night do to undermine my success. I’m afraid this success won’t last.


The best way to tune out negative and self-defeating thoughts is to tune in to uplifting, liberating ones. If we merely suppress thoughts we don’t like, they’ll remain in our subconscious or unconscious mind and grow in strength. In time, in one way or another, they’ll burst forth. The healthy way of ridding ourselves of unwanted thoughts is through substitution.




Stay very aware of your thoughts all day. Be there to watch new thoughts cropping up.


We a positive thought arises, give it you full attention and allow other positive thoughts to follow the first one.


When a negative thought pops up, give it your full attention. For instance, you may catch yourself thinking, “That was a miserable thing for Sam to say. How could he insinuate such things about my powers of judgment?” You may be tempted to follow the first negative thought with another, such as, “Just wait till have a chance to get back at him. I’ll show him who’s got good judgment and who hasn’t. He’ll be sorry he ever opened his mouth”. Instead of adding more thoughts in the chain of negatives, substitute positive thought such as, “I know I made a perfectly sound decision in that situation. There’s nothing wrong with my judgment Sam must have had a bad day to have said what he did”.





Recall all the times you’ve made up your mind to act a certain way in a given situation only to be taken aback when your visceral reaction prompted you to do otherwise. Even though you’ve decided to be lovely, honest, and serene, you find yourself being spiteful, jealous, and agitated. To one who is sincerely trying to tame the mind, this gap between what one wants to be and what one actually is can be very discouraging, even bewildering. Those who’ve gone this route before tell us, “Take heart. The gap between the actual and the ideal is due to your innate, unmanifested urges, which, when properly understood, will exhaust themselves in due course”.

Each one of us has a unique personally, much as each flower has a unique shape and fragrance. This personality, this set of tendencies in the mind is the result of countless impressions from the past. When we do not live in a state of pure detachment and agelessness, every thought and action leaves an impression in our unconscious that urges us toward repetition of that thought or action, thus establishing a characteristic tendency in the personality.


As we have seen in earlier chapters, we are separate from our machine like minds. We first have to understand the mere mechanical of the mind, then we have to set about reprogramming it just as it takes some time for a computer to be reprogrammed, to act in a way different from before, it will take time for our innate urges to exhaust themselves and for our thoughts to be rechanneled to run along more healthy lines.


“Finding the Centre”: calming the mind thought disinterested witnessing of thoughts.


“A Hall of Mirrors”: focusing the mind on one thought.


“Tuning the Radio”: substituting positive thoughts for negative ones.


When the mind exercise is over, we feel positive and refreshed, because we have scrubbed the mind clean of some portion of the buildup of impressions encrusted upon it. On some days (when the mind succeeds in becoming very calm and focused), we manage to scrub at a relatively deep level, on other days, the cleaning job is more superficial. Either way, the mind experiences relief.


·                Exercises in contemplation on our true nature


“Reality Is Not What It Seems”: understanding what we are not then becoming aware of the reality behind the changing appearances.


Our innate urges will naturally drop away as we grow in our understanding of who we really are. Just as a child grown into a teenager releases his or her attachment to the dolls and toy soldiers of childhood, so we quite automatically release our hold on old patterns of thought once we mature into a deeper understand of ourselves.


To ensure continued growth toward realization of our real nature, we need to continue with these taming-of-the-mind and deepening-of-our-under-standing exercises. Still, the mind may resist. The mind can be pretty stub-born and may not lend itself readily to remolding. It may need to be made more pliable. Just as glass needs to be heated before it can be shaped into a delicate glass figurine, so also the mind needs to be heated before it can be molded. The source of that heat is sated in our emotional selves.


Intellectual appreciation is not sufficient for molding the mind. You need to combine your appreciation of your goal with a strong emotional inclination in the same direction. You can bring that melding of the head and heart to the exercises you’ve already learned for calming and focusing the mind. This is the final version of the same exercise.


DO THIS (Mind-Stilling Exercise #4)


Find a quite moment sometime during the day. It’s best to find a time that’s good for you every day: after you shower in the morning but before you breakfast, before you lunch break at noon, or before going to bed at night.



You may have found, or may still discover that a calmed mind can bring a new measure of happiness and control in your life. However, be aware that only knowledge and understanding can transform you. This section focuses on that self-transforming knowledge (although some aspects of it have already been introduced). The full transformation is possible only when you remember to take these tow key steps:


1.             Calming down the mind and focusing it.

2.             Then, with a calmed and focused mind, shifting your mind’s perspective enough so that it dares to think differently and see life afresh.


We traverse these two worlds – the waking-world and the dream-world – every twenty-four hours, yet we don’t stop to think what those very dramatic transitions mean. In addition to these two, we also traverse yet another world every twenty-four hours, that of deep-sleep. It’s different from the dream-world, for the mind is at rest in deep sleep. No tigers or Doberman pinschers chase us there. Without deep sleep, we would wake up tired, feeling as though we had hardly slept at all. In the walking-world, our conscious mind functions, in the dream-world, our subconscious mind has its play and in the deep-sleep-world, our mind remains in its manifested, unconscious state.


Why do we think the walking world is any more real than the dream world? Or, to put it another way, if we conclude that the dream-world it unreal, what stops us from concluding that the walking-world is not just as unreal? Each is but a manifestation of the particular state of our thoughts, whether conscious or subconscious. In the dream-world, our subconscious thoughts form very real images and elicit very real emotions. To the dream-you, the dream-dog is very concrete. In the waking-world, our conscious thoughts create our reality, which elicits very real emotions in response. 


The subtle thinkers of our planet have discovered yet another world, a fourth one, called literally “the fourth,” or turiya, in Sanskrit. It is what we are calling Consciousness in this book, the ground of al being. It is, in fact, a fourth state of consciousness, sometimes called a transcendental state, because it transcends the worlds we are more familiar with, those of awaking, dream, and deep sleep.


Lift the veil of the mind, and the peace of the fourth state is yours.





Those they have inspired drop their mundane activities, their self-centered efforts to build their personal fortunes, and traverse half the country or half the globe to dedicate their lives to a broader cause.


The undifferentiated consciousness of an infant can barely discern the boundary between itself and mother.


In the India that grew out of the Vedic tradition, al knowledge was considered a part of one all-encompassing knowledge, all a part of the grand striving for understanding the truth of existence.


Suggest two key aspects of ideal learning: the integration of all learning and the assimilation of all that is learned. In Vedanta, which seeks to describe something beyond the realm of existence we can perceive or describe, the task of expressing information is nearly impossible.




Added mobimage

Click to add text, images, and other conteqnt


Click to add text, images, and other content


Click to add text, images, and other content